Archive for the 'Vehicular Reviews' Category

19
Apr

RadioActive…

Okay, it’s cars like this that justify Hamsexy’s reason for existing.

This was submitted to us several months ago, but because of our hitaus, we were unable to present it to you until now.

Out of Jupiter, Florida …. We bring you quite possibly the Hamsexiest 1985 Dodge Colt ever to grace our pages.

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RadioActive – a decal-and-antenna heavy car….
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If you think the OUTSIDE is Hamsexy….
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… you ain’t seen NOTHIN’ yet….
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Front passenger door
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It certainly is…
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Apparently it’s got hydraulics… but I can’t imagine why.
13
Jan

Skywarn Sexiness

If there’s one thing we can’t get enough of on Hamsexy, it’s ‘chase vehicles’.

Skywarn is a great example of an organization full of people with weird, wild and wonderful ‘storm chaser’ rigs … a few rudimentary classes on what a wall cloud looks like and graduates are suddenly storm chasing experts, flush with a newfound entitlement to pollute the family minivan with lights, antennae and a laptop running a pirated version of GRLevel3 to magically turn it into a ‘chase vehicle’. Most have no real idea of the dangers of speeding headlong into a storm …. they are more interested in having flashing lights, decals and radios in their car than really doing much good. Anyone who doubts us can tune into any Skywarn net during any of the 300 thunderstorms that happen in summers across North America….only if you are interested in hearing reports of ‘rain’ a hundred times an hour.

A good source of Hamsexy gold can be found in this thread, where storm chasers of all stripes masturbate to eachothers ‘chase’ vehciles, marvelling at all of the flashing lights they have.

The whole Skywarn mindset is summed up by a few messages in the thread, including this one by user “Chipper:”

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The vehicles themselves range from pretty mundane to Hamsexy gold (even though some aren’t even hams…. I guess they think that studying for the test would take away from valuable ‘chase’ time).

While most are pickup trucks, SUVs or even minivans, some are forced to make do with whatever they have at hand. Here’s a great family truckster pimped out to be one hell of a sweet chase vehicle from Illinois….

[Image removed as per Hamsexy's Polite Request Policy]
Take note of he non-committal of the magnetic storm spotter decals… You know, just to advertise to everybody that he’s on the case without actually committing to it (most likely so his insurance company won’t find out that he’s using his car to ‘punch the core’. The luggage-rack mounted lightbar is also a nice touch… I’d like to see what happens when a strong storm wind gets a hold of that sucker.

[Image removed as per Hamsexy's Polite Request Policy]
Is this guy impressed with himself, or what?  ***OFFICIAL*** NWS Storm Spotter. Isn’t that like being an ***OFFICIAL*** Union Pacific Railfan?

[Image removed as per Hamsexy's Polite Request Policy]

His radio rack is also pretty weak. Chickenband radio, FRS with aftermarket speakermike, and a couple of out-of-date scanners. The **OFFICIAL*** NWS Storm Spotter laminate is a nice touch, too – just in case the Tornado asks for identification before it tosses your car four miles into a beanfield.

But… what happens when you don’t actually have your own chase vehicle? Do you just sit and read the Chase Vehicle thread with envy in your eyes… no way dude… fire up that pirated version of photoshop and lets start dreaming!!

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Behold… the Weatherwarrior. A blue soccermom cruiser with orange velocity stripes, random junk bolted to the roofrack, pointless smiles of sheetmetal slopily riveted over the tires, a badly drawn tailgate being held open with a giant tampon, and a $3000 pornocam attached to the rear bumper. The Weather Warrior’s website is pretty funny too, but I’ll let you guys visit that site on your own. To his credit, I don’t see any lightbars or anything, but maybe Whelan’s website was down when he was searching for stuff to cut and paste onto the Weather Warrior.

Or, if you like, you can take the minimalist approach:

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Orange lightbars…. three orange ocotpus suckers… And the same three-light element from the lightbar photoshopped on various places around the front of the truck. If only the emergency lighting equipment that he wants to attach to his truck actually existed, he’d have one sweet looking ride.

Lights, lights, lights. As long as the good Lord continues to smite our Earth with severe weather, there will always be storm nerds willing to toss some lights on their mom’s car to go chasing after it. Here’s a pretty cool photo of a storm chase vehicle posing in front of a sight few of us would ever be privileged to see: the birth of a tornado. The majesty of nature’s might and fierce indifference nature holds towards us has absolutley no meaning to those who choose to see what they want to see in the world:

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19
Oct

British RAYNET Whacker

From M3ECM
Spied recently at a RAYNET (British “ARES”) event was this whacker
mobile. Sporting a very hamsexy “RAYNET” board bolted to the roof rack,
complete with the
ultra-bright-no-whacker-should leave-the-house-without-one orange rotating beacon.

Not content with one antenna, he has a total of four:
Dual band 144/433MHz colinear (magmount)
Loaded HF vertical (bolted to roof rack)
70MHz quarter wave whip (magmount)
last and almost certainly least, an on-glass scanner antenna. Make your own mind up, but this guy is a total whack-job – ex british police and also was a member of St. John Ambulance….

Also spotted was this Rover with a “State of Georgia” plate on the front.

Clicky to biggie





03
Sep

New Disturbing Whacker

Gotta love the whackers!!

cvpi1.jpgThis guy, YouTube username scnermn2004 (first name Keith) – who would be declared the new king of the whackers, if his videos weren’t so bone-chillingly disturbing.

A thread was posted about these videos on RR, but for some reason a moderator stepped out of nowhere and locked the thread for… well… for pretty much no reason.
Here’s his first video.

Nice move, dipshit… Getting in the way of a high speed pursuit so we can hear you say dumbshit things like “fuck yeah”, “go get ‘em boy!” and “yeeeea”.
Here’s a great video of the geek’s supersweet siren box install – in his glove compartment.

It goes beyond interfering with police chases.

Here’s a video of his very nerdy, VERY illegal ‘patrol’ vehicle – at least he had the sense to shoot it in a parking garage and not out in public – probably too afraid of the homeboys icing him for being a cop wannabe, or just embarassed.

And now, he’re the icing on this cake…. what do you do when you’ve got your car decked out with illegal lighting? Why, you weave around in traffic at night with your lights on! (complete with whacker music).
So, are these guys real cops? Of course not! Some Hamsexy members tried to send them messages through YouTube (on the videos that haven’t had comments blocked). Skiatook911, who is a police dispatcher, was met with this message from him:

Thanks for the comments, wow i give you high praise for being a 911 dispatcher, I’m closer than you think to becoming a peace officer, so whacker will no longer be directed towards me, but thanks for the comment anyway, idiot.

We’ve brought dangerous whackers like this to justice before. According to his YouTube profile, he lives in Santa Cruz, California. We ask the many Hamsexy members and friends who are police officers, please get these guys off the road before they get hurt or hurt others. We’ve got a few police officers on this guy’s case, so we’ll see what happens when they contact their brothers in Santa Cruz.

We will keep you all updated as we find out more information.

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We had some technical difficulties, so we’ve lost the comments for this thread. Please re-post them!

We also want to thank the fine men and women at officer.com for linking to us, and helping us bring this guy to justice, or at least educate him on the dangerous errors of his ways.

19
Mar

Cut lightbar sexy

Tim K8TEK submitted this find on the Hamsexy Forums…. and what a find… (click on image for larger) Tim writes:

I was at a sporting goods store, and parked next to this jem.The lightbar is A Code3 MX7000 with the center speaker section removed, and in its place is a amber strobe with a cigarette lighter cord running thru the passenger side door. The lenses of the poor MX7000 are painted yellow. As you can see from the pictures, the yellow paint is starting to melt off, exposing the red beneath.

 

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15
Jan

Scooter Sexy

As an avid motorcyclist, I’ve had the opportunity to try out various types of two-wheel vehicles. When I was living in Taiwan, my main ride was a nice 150cc black Kymco scooter. My current bike is a 2000 Honda Shadow 750. I’ve been caught in enough storms on my bike to know that stormchasing on two wheels is probably one of the worst ideas man has ever come up with (I remember hearing about some 13 year old nerd in Toronto who used to chase supercells on a bicycle). Once when I was riding from Rochester NY to Toronto after visiting friends, I got caught in a freak April thunderstorm. Hunched on my parked bike in an open rest area while being pelted with one-inch hail somewhere in upstate New York was probably one of the scariest experiences of my life….. With that, I give you… the WeatherScooter.

This monstrosity of nerdiness was submitted on the Hamsexy Forums by good friend of the site KU4MY at some hamfest in South Carolina. I don’t care what anyone says … there is absolutley NO WAY anyone can avoid looking like a complete nerd riding a scooter. It’s a LITTLE better when you’re in Asia, because it’s the only way to get around and everyone else is riding them… but in North America… it’s a hard look to pull off. This guy certainly doesn’t help matters.

The only reason this thing isn’t loaded down with radios is that it’s puny 150cc motor and alternator wouldn’t be able to handle the load – these things can barely handle it’s own headlights.

Click on the images to make them bigger.
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15
Nov

Tennesseein’ is Tennessbelievin’

An anonymous contributor visited the Gray, TN hamfest last Saturday. While there were many hamsexy people in attendance, there were two vehicles that stuck out. Our anonymous contributor thus spake:

Went to Gray, TN hamfest (Near Bristol) and found a couple of “Hamsexy” cars in the parking lot. (Click on the images to see them in their full glory)

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Now THIS is an antenna system. Why waste all that money buying a tower, putting in concrete, guy wires, and turnbuckles, etc. when you can just take it with you all in one package!!!

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Be careful of any bridge or overpass as you go. I don’t think the Brooklyn Bridge would be enough clearance if this were going under it.

Thanks, Mystery Man! Keep your Hamfest photo submissions coming – our submission e-mail address is hamsexy.submissions@gmail.com – we appreciate and will publish any and all (most) submissions. Take care!

13
Oct

Monster Mobile!!

Earl N4ZFA sent us some photos of the N4OFA VHF/UHF Monster-mobile at the Sevierville TEN-TEC hamfest.

Having an antenna that size takes SERIOUS committment…… That’s all I’ll say.

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