John K1BOS (who would like you all to know that the car is NOT HIS) immediatley thought of Hamsexy when he saw this car at the Waltham Amateur Radio Association & Clay Center Amateur Radio Club Field Day 2010 even in Brookline, Massachusetts - and took some truly incredible photos.

Someone decided to take an old E-Class Mercedes and give it a hefty German slap in the face. Keep in mind that this car is on DISPLAY — it is at this Field Day Event because they want to show off the cool things that you can do with Ham Radio. Okay, so they filled a car with antennas and radios…. but holy shit, you’d think they would have enough sense to… oh, I dunno, tidy it up a bit? Pick up the trash? Maybe freshen the duct tape holding the radios onto the dashboard? This car is such an accurate protrayal of what Amateur Radio is these days… sloppy, unkempt, old, redundant, possibly smelly and really not caring about the image it portrays to the outside world.

Enjoy!!

View with the doors open, possibly to air it out.

The cockpit. The multimeter is a nice touch.

The rear working area. Pictured is Paul Bunyan’s HT, a whole lot of duct tape, a morse key and notepad suitable only for left handed people with a lubricated swivel for a midsection, and a whole lot of clutter.

The ass-end of this embarrassment on wheels. It’s unplated, which I guess is a consolation that nobody in their right mind actually has this deathtrap as their daily driver.

Detail of the driver’s seat. This is just a mess of cables, trash, duct tape, radios and sadness. I have no idea what’s taped to the centre of the steering wheel, but I’m sure it’s pointless.

As always, we welcome your submissions. It’s where we get most of our material from. Send it to hamsexy.submissions@gmail.com, and if it’s a good submission like K1BOS’s, we’ll publish it. Stay Classy, Ham Radio….

Okay, fine - I took the fucking post down.

After a tidal wave of whining emails regarding this, either from the guy who made those stupid ID cards, people whose photos may or may not have appeared on the ID cards, or people whose callsigns appear on the parody cards I made (the callsigns of which I just pulled out of my ass when making the cards, by the way) - I’ve just decided to take the fucking post down than continue to be embarrassed by your childish whining.

This whole stupid ordeal just goes to show why amateur radio will, thankfully, be dead in 15 years, when the old, cranky, overweight non-procreating men who current occupy space in this hobby will mercifully die. Then, the amateur bands can be turned over to something useful, like public safety, media, broadcasting, etc… anything but the old fart geeky whinefest that goes on these days.

Remember when Ham Radio was a vital service? When I was a kid I used to see the local amateur radio club at conventions and events, doing long distance relay messages for your friends or family, and I thought that was so cool… Extremely long distance, real time communication was something that didn’t exist for most people at that time, and it was a novelty.

Then, something terrible happened to ham radio: progress. Nowadays, with cell phones, long distance calls without the assistance of an operator and the internet have made communicating with people around the world commonplace and uninteresting. The rest of the world rocketed forward while Ham Radio stood still. There have been a few brave people who attempted to incorporate new technology into ham radio, but the ‘old guard’ resisted like someone was taking away their triple Baconator… WHAT? IRLP? THAT’S NOT HAM RADIO. WHAT? DIGITAL? THAT’S ENCRYPTION AND NOT ALLOWED. And don’t even get me started on those fucking idiots who claim that Ham Radio is a ‘vital public service’, and that it MMMMUUUSSSTTTT be maintained ‘when all else fails’…. Well, so far the only disasters that Ham Radio has been useful at have been those where self-important hams have crowbarred their way in. Hams are only good at calling in rain to Skywarn net control, fetching coffee for the REAL first responders (the ones that belong to licensed, government sanctioned organizations that actually have physical fitness requirements) or patrolling little kiddies on halloween. That’s it. And take the fucking lightbar off of your car, you fat loser … you are embarrassing us all.

Face it - Ham Radio will be all but gone in a lot shorter time than all of us realize. If you want to find out the culprit, it isn’t Echolink or BPL or Riley or even Barack Obama - it’s YOU, you smelly, fat, old piece of shit. YOU.

Ever since we launched Hamsexy over 200 years ago (okay, more like six years), we’ve had our share of detractors. Our lawyers have quite the collection of cease and desist letters, lawsuits, angry e-mails, death threats, and even people searching out the addresses of one of our co-founders, visiting him at home and and threatening bodily harm (thankfully our co-founder is a gun owner and was able to defuse the situation like a gentleman)… but, most of all, we’ve had a plethora of WHINERS. Big, fat, white, lazy whiners. Do you know what happens if you leave a cooked ham leg out in the sun? It starts WEEPING TEARS OF FAT.

So, because of the whiners, the post is gone. Poof. Gone…. and those who did whine (check out the comments thread to see two of them, mainly the callsign-less Chris and Colin AE7HF (I’m sure he’ll whine about me using his callsign on the main page, too… and maybe threaten to sue us)) - maybe I kindly suggest that you go fuck yourself with the correct end of a dull knife.

Pitiful.

Reader Steve submitted this new fashion statement that’s sure to be hitting all of the hamfests this year.

Hopefully they come in big and tall sizes for the average ham.

I don’t know if Steve made this up or not, but it’s pure genius:

Submitted by Cory, AH6GI
Armed Ohio Man, K8JSM, Arrested Near Obama’s Plane is Harmless, Friends Say.

From: http ://chattahbox.com/us/2010/04/26/armed-man-driving-fake-police-vehicle-arrested-near-obamas-plane

Here’s a story about a rare thing: a chick who’s into ham…. and apparently she’s an asshole, too. Irene Levy KJ6CEY is in a little bit of trouble, it would seem. She’s quite the looker too… CQ sweetpea…

This story has everything — threats, multitudes of radio equipment, seven scanners, a mobile home, bomb threats and a good dose of the kind of common sense amateur radio operators are known for. She also hasn’t even licensed for a year, according to FCC records (found here), she’s got a tech license. It appears her husband is a ham too, and has been licensed a little longer.

Click here for the link to the story (credit: Southwest Riverside News Network)

Submitted by Bryan VE6HBD, from a Super 8 Motel in Sawyer, Michigan.

All hotels in Dayton, Ohio are being refitted with the ARRL Standard Part 90 s/s 2 Paragraph 4 shower stall, designed to fit the dimensions of the modern amateur radio operator. Complete with loading ramp for Hamabout scooter.

Reprinted from the ARRL without permission (http://www.arrl.org/news/stories/2010/01/18/11293/)

Dominican Hams Attempt to Install Repeaters in Haiti

Eight members of the Radio Club Dominicano (RCD) — the Dominican Republic’s IARU Member-Society — and Union Dominicana de Radio Aficionados (UDRA) arrived in Haiti on Friday, January 15, to install an emergency radio communications station and a mobile station. Shortly after they arrived, the hams returned to the Dominican Republic for safety reasons.

team — using the call sign HI8RCD/HH — had to shut down their operations after their convoy was fired on. Germinal Garcia, EB9GF, who is integrated in the Spanish Red Cross contingent, was able to contact colleagues at the RCD. According to IARU Region 1 Emergency Communications Coordinator Greg Mossop, G0DUB, the RCD initially reported that their team crossed the Haitian border at 1550 UTC, time arriving at the Dominican Embassy in Haiti at 1929 UTC when they started installing and testing their equipment.

“Within a few hours though, reports via the RCD Facebook page — confirmed by a long telephone conversation between Hugo Ramón, HI8VRS, and Ramon Santoyo, XE1KK — reported that the HI8RCD team of eight amateurs were back in the [Dominican Republic] border town of Jimani,” Mossop said. “Their convoy, which included other non related Dominicans, was assaulted and one person is reported dead. The radio amateurs are uninjured, but they decided to leave the capital for safety [reasons] and return to the border unescorted. They report the situation as ‘extremely unsafe.’”

On Saturday afternoon at 2104 UTC, Rafael Martinez, HI8ROX, posted this to the RCD’s Facebook page: “I regret to inform you that the communications equipment is returning to Jimani due to the lack of security that there is in Haiti. The convoy was attacked as the team was leaving the embassy, with several wounded people confirmed. I do not know how many. For the moment, our equipment is safe, but I’m not sure.” Martinez is the RCD’s Web master.

On January 19, Martinez told the ARRL that two non-ham members of the team suffered “bad injuries,” but no one had been killed, as had been reported earlier: “The gentleman who was behind the RCD convoy was very severely wounded (not deceased), although the first news was that he had passed away. The gentleman only is very severely wounded along with another person.”

The team was able to install two VHF repeaters in the Dominican Republic linking that country’s capital — Santo Domingo — and Port-au-Prince, but only one is in operation: 146.880 (-600), CTCSS 100 Hz. Mossop said that these repeaters are being used by the Red Cross and Civil Defense “since there is no other way to communicate. The station at the embassy in Haiti could not be activated. To confirm, all members of the RCD team are safe and have returned to Jimani in the Dominican Republic.”

On the morning of Monday, January 18, Martinez wrote that “the equipment that was returned to Santo Domingo is all being sent to Jimani and then sporadically to Port-au-Prince.”

Details are sketchy, but it looks like Jayhaed Saade was back on the air for a brief time today.

Listeners to his internet stream reported on Digital Home that he was back on the air with a 30 watt transmitter and apparently tired to kill himself, forcing several listeners to call 911 and causing an on-the-air showdown with the police.

Audio of the drama this afternoon are forthcoming, and will be posted here as soon as possible.