Hot off the Whacker News Wire…

(Story comes to Hamsexy from WBNS 10TV – original story here.)

ONTARIO, Ohio — A man who investigators said was impersonating a police officer was arrested when officers caught him in the act, 10TV News reported Friday.

The most recent incident occurred about two weeks ago when Fred Heitzman, also known as known as Clyde, tried to pull a woman over.

Sophia Toney said she did not feel safe stopping, so she called police who told her to meet an actual officer at a nearby parking lot, 10TV’s Glenn McEntyre reported.

“He had a spotlight on the side of his car like police officers do,” Toney said. “When he turned on the rotating light that’s when I thought I was in trouble.”

Heitzman called the police department and asked for backup.

“This is Fred. Can you have a marked unit meet me at the foot of the bridge?” Heitzman told the dispatcher.

“What police department are you from?” the dispatcher said.

“Um, auxiliary patrol,” Heitzman answered.

“From where?” the dispatcher asked.

“Auxiliary state patrol,” Heitzman said.

“He is portraying himself as a police officer, which he is not in any shape or form,” said Ontario police officer Jason Day.

Pictures from the Ontario police department show Heitzman’s pretend police cruiser, fully equipped with lights in the front and back windshields, McEntyre reported.

Heitzman was arrested when an officer was sent to meet Toney in a parking lot. His car was impounded.

Heitzman was charged in two incidents in which police said he pulled over women for traffic violations. In both cases, police said he asked for ID, told the drivers to do better and then let them go.

“I think he believes that he’s just doing his part to keep the roadways safe,” Day said. “Leave law enforcement to the professionals.”

A search of the FCC database does not return any hits for any Heitzman with a first or middle initial of F or Clyde in Ohio, so (thankfully) this tool’s not a hamster.

But seriously – calling police over the air? I honestly laughed out loud.

See all the fantastic pictures here.

Edit: There’s a great live video of this story here.

Officer Dick clear.

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